Answers: Pearl Necklace's Questions

These questions come from Pearl Necklace over at Happily Surrendered and Submissive.  My apologies for taking so long to get to them.  It's been a little crazy over here this past week few weeks.  (In a totally awesome way, which I'll get to in later posts!!!)

You talk about waiting to physically be reunited with your guy...Have you two shared this D/s life in person or did it start while you have been apart?

Master and i have been together for half a dozen years now.  We have had a fairly vanilla sex life during that time.  Occasionally, we'd try new things, but it didn't delve into anything really kinky until last summer.  i've been interested in (and have experimented with) elements of kink in other relationships, but always assumed that my husband wouldn't be interested in it.  We were both raised very traditionally and i have very different ideas about sex and relationships than He does.  Comments and small conversations early on in our relationship didn't make Him appear very open so i closed down that part of my sexuality.  That causes some problems.

Our communication was never very good, but we had a major fight last summer and after when we were calming down, i finally dropped this major bombshell: that i provoke or continue the arguments so that He'll get rough with me because it turns me on.  The make-up sex we had when He's still mad me, when it's rough, when He's forceful, that i need more of that.  That led to us experimenting with a few things, some rougher sex, some elements of D/s and kink.  Some things went well and we liked, some of what we tried didn't because we just needed more research and communication into what we liked and wanted.

But then he left...for 9 months.  Which makes further exploration really hard.  When you're separated and all you can do is talk, it allows you to work out some things.  We hit a few roadblocks in our marriage along the way, but TTWD has helped improve our communication and also allowed us to better see how we want to shape our future.  

One thing you NEVER thought you would try that you have or are now willing to?

i think the biggest thing that i never thought that i would try is our dynamic.  i always was drawn to kink: bondage, breath play, toys.  But never would I have thought that i would call my husband "Master" and "Sir" or enjoy it!  Or to allow another person to control ALL of my sexual experiences.  Seven months later, it feels natural.