Christmas is not really my holiday. There are a few old family traditions that i follow from childhood; but i’m not big on the huge family celebrations and i don’t like traveling and dealing with family drama. Christmas, to me, is celebrated for my kids. i love watching them opening their gifts. Watching as my living room becomes a mess of wrapping paper and cardboard. i’m the photographer of the family so i’m always trying to capture every moment, the joy, and the perfect expression. i don’t want to have to stop to open my own presents. Occurring to me now, in this submissive role, that i’m much more of a giver than a receiver and i’m uncomfortable being the center of attention and receiving something.
Got up super early and was able to open up a few of my presents (the ones from Master to his submissive) in private on the phone early in the morning. i sent all of His early, fretted about them making it in time, and was relieved when they arrived last week. Normal presents from our kids to their Daddy…clothes and an Old Spice gift set, a couple funny gag gifts from His very snarky wife…
And one very special present from scarlet to her Master…
i wanted Him to have something to remind Him that He is my Master. That i am His. Granted it’s not something that He can wear openly, but under His shirt He can, and it will remind Him that i am His.
But wow! i am a very spoiled whore! Magic Wand and variable speed control! Then there are all these wonderful attachment pieces to go on the end of the wand. OMG, i can not wait to try this out! (But fuck, does it have to be so loud? Now i have to wait till after the grandma leaves this weekend! :/ )
The kids really enjoyed their Christmas. i was happy for them, yet sad that we were missing part of our family. It’s really hard to wrangle children, hand out presents, record video, take pictures, and make sure nothing important gets thrown away all at the same time when there’s only one of you! Plus, i was running at a very low operating level Christmas day.
About 10 pm Christmas Eve, i developed a massive migraine. Not the kind that come on slow and work their way to full strength or the ones that i can usually just tough through. This was the sudden onset, straight to 10, knock-you-on-your-ass migraine. i had just finished up wrapping presents and was about to straighten up the kitchen before going to make a short video for Master. Nope…not happening.
Up at midnight to get sick. Up at 1am…2am…2:30am…egh, you get the idea. Now there’s been some “if it could go wrong, it’s gone wrong” shit happen in the past couple of weeks. And there’s been some annoying “why must this shit break now” too. i swear i need an exterminator to get Murphy out of my house. i’m curled up in bed in the fetal position and all i can think is of course you’re sick, something had to happen today. Yet, my usual snarkiness was failing me to find the funny in this one. It hurt too much to cry though.
Got up and did presents with Master, then toughed through presents with the kids. Then spent every possible moment on the couch with a space heater as close as possible under a blanket. i just could not get warm and i hurt and i had chills and i wanted to die. And the toddler wanted to scream.
By the end of the day, i ended up in sitting at the ER…exactly how i imagined my Christmas Eve going. So thankful for a friend that helped me out, but i felt so bad that i had barely spent anytime with my kids on Christmas and here i was spending several hours of the late evening in the ER getting fluids for severe dehydration and a shot for my migraine.
Took me a couple of days to figure out the bright side to being sick at the holidays…i didn’t gain any weight! Didn’t lose any either, but at least i came out the other side of Christmas without having to worry about resetting my goals.